Bleurgh

Saturday I wasn't feeling so good. Sunday I felt so bad I missed going to an Eric Clapton concert. Monday I was off work, and my head felt like it had been encased in alien drool. Tuesday wasn't much better, and today I dragged my aching carcass into the office to enter my time and sort a few things out.

I think it's the 'flu. I hope it's the 'flu, and not Tiberian Galloping Lurgy, which has complications I don't even WANT to go into here.

My joints ache, my head aches, I have too much mucous, and oddly enough my left eyeball feels bigger than my right eyeball. So tired.

Free Hugs

I got two free hugs today. I was heading out for lunch, walking on the north side of Jasper Avenue. I crossed from the City TV block to Commerce Place, and as I did so I saw three girls with placards that said 'FREE HUGS'. I never turn up the chance of a free hug.

I hope they were inspired by this story on YouTube that I saw last year. It really was cool.

I watched them from the window of my office. They were there most of the afternoon, and then they went. A little later, they were back - but it was a different crew! On the way home I had to get some cash from the bank, and I managed to get a second hug. Bonus!

Funny The First 100 Times

When I'm pushing an empty wheelchair quickly around the concourse at the stadium, it's REALLY funny if you say one of the following:

• Is that for me?!
• Oh, it's for her, she needs it!
• Over here!
• Can I have a ride?

Bonus points if you pretend to get into it.

Wasted Time

A concert. The support act finishes. I walk back to the first aid post with my team. We sit and relax. After a while people head back out to their posts. I finish talking with the paramedic.

As I start to leave security brings in a girl. I lead her into the room and attend with the paramedic. She is pale, diaphorectic, and shaking. We give her a "convenience bag" to help her deal with any "protein spills" - a puke bag. We ask her questions: when did she last eat; when did she last drink; has she had anything else; does she have any medical conditions.

As we take a set of vitals on her the story comes out. Yesterday was the last day of her 9 day drinking binge. She often does this. She has done so since she was 13. That is six years of binge drinking.

We try not to be judgemental. We try to tell her, factually, what will happen to her body. We mention what is happening to her body now. We tell her that she has the DTs. She listens. She looks at us flatly.

Security return to get her details. She is told that she is done for the night - home time. She calls her mother. After a while I take her in a wheelchair to the parking area. I hand her over to her parent. I return to the post.

I reflect on how a pretty girl in her late teens has been an alcoholic for six years.

Top Gear: Car Lightning

One of THE best programs on Brit TV, with the craziest of features.

What would happen if you car actually got hit by lightning?

Important To Me: Reading

Reading is important to me. I started reading early, I read a lot. I read most of the books in my primary school, including all the cool Greek Mythology stuff. I read the bible before I was 10, because of the awesome stories. I developed favourites, books that I would re-read, characters that I could return to like old friends.

I also liked to climb trees. I can remember at least two times where I combined these two passions and read up a tree.

My paternal nan got me interested in science fiction. We would go over to see her and grandad on Sundays. My brother and I would wander around near their house, then come back and help make dinner, and then watch Space 1999 and Thunderbirds and such things on TV. She let me read all their Issac Asimov and Harry Harrison books.

One of the most thoughtful and moving books I have ever read is Zen And The Art Of Motorcycle Maintenance.

My favourite set of books is the Saga of the Exiles.

I have a lot of books. I want more. I like to read. Reading is important to me.

The Right Attitude

There is no way in which I compare to the author of this post apart from how I try to act whilst on duty. I aspire to behave in this manner when providing patient care. I only hope I am able to do so as well.

"Are you gonna do the accent or not?"

One of the best film parodies ever!

Think that's a beach?

oldphoto
Originally uploaded by rattlingdjs.

Think again!

My sister scanned in this picture, I remember when it was taken. I must have been 12 or 13 at the time, and pretty emo.

The location is here, just to one side of a ramp. The only bit of sand around was right there. We'd often walk west along the river bank to the pub at the end of Ferry Road. Lots of fun. One day, I want to go back and see how everything is.

Test Post

This was a double test - of my new RAZR phone, and to see if Flickr and Blogger can talk to each other nicely.
Originally uploaded by Morpheus_uk.

Status Update

Things are interesting.

Work is actually stimulating me again, for the first time in a while. I think it is a combination of being on multiple projects plus actually doing the stuff that I enjoy.

My medical volunteering with the St. John Ambulance Brigade is still as exciting as it ever was. Not only do I get to help people and attend fun events, I also get to work with a great bunch of people. Many of these people are now very dear friends.

In terms of my life, I feel more positive and upbeat than I have in a long time. I think the impending resolution of my marriage is helping towards this. I think that realising that I am loved by many, and love many in return, takes the edge off a little too. Heh.

I'm eager to see what is next.

Back

I'm back in Canada now. First day back at work today. A new year. All that jazz.

I went back to England twice last year, and the first time I returned to Edmonton in June. As I was on the plane, I felt very melancholy. When I landed, I caught the bus to Edmonton. As we rolled along the highway, I thought how no one would be at the bus station to meet me, and how I would trundle my cases along to my appartment where I would unpack them alone.

When I was on the plane this time, I felt the same way. As I was on the bus to Edmonton, that feeling changed. I realised that I no one would be there to meet me at the bus station, but that was just because I didn't arrange it. My phone was buzzing with text messages from all the wonderful people who had missed me. I had already arranged to meet several of them over the next few days.

Yes, I'm still living alone, but my situation has changed so much. I've made so many new friends and rediscovered many more. I'm very happy to know all these wonderful people.

I just need to keep reminding myself of that.

These Things Seem To Find Me

I was at a concert the other day, as a first aid volunteer. I was in the first aid post, with lots of incidents going on, and first aiders were in and out. A guy was brought down after being punched in the face. Security escorted him in, and I started writing up his details on our incident reports whilst two other first aiders dealt with his bloody nose.

He said he was hit because he was gay, because he was brown, because he was talking to some guys girl. I told him I didn't care, I wanted to fix him up so he could enjoy his day. This kind of thing pisses me off. I really don't like it when people use things like that as a reason. You are not just gay, you are not just brown, you are a human, and you have a right not to be punched in the face - but if you make everything into an issue, then you will get treated like an issue, and not as a person.

I was firm and direct, and got the information I needed. Everyone else got called away. The security guard closed the door to the first aid post, he was still there whilst the security teams worked out what was happening with the 'puncher' upstairs. Eventually the radio spake, and the guard said, "Other witnesses said you started it, and you are out".

I was sitting at the desk, they were by the door. After this announcement, the guy was a little upset, and got visibly agitated. The guard was all "turn around, I am going to restrain you" and the guy was all "Er, no". They got into what was pretty much a 'slap fight'. I was trying hard not to laugh.

In the scuffle the lights to the room were turned off. I rolled my eyes hugely in the pitch black darkness, got my flashlight from my belt and turned it on. I pointed it at the two of them, and the lightswitch. The guard by this point had the guy on the bed, and he looked at me with a "sorry" look on his face and turned the light back on. I was still rolling my eyes as he escorted the guy out.

I told our supervisor about the incident, and filled out an unusual incident report:
Problem: "During a scuffle, lights in the first aid room got turned off" Resolution: "Turned lights back on"

Communication

I was reminded by something I read about an incident I dealt with in summer, at the Heritage Days festival here in Edmonton.

Three ladies of somewhat advanced years came over to the first aid post. One was looking a bit peaky, and she only spoke in Hebrew. The other two were from St. Albert, and all three were Jewish. Their friend was over from Israel - "The area that is currently being bombed", she said, via translation - and had left her medication at her friends house in St. Albert. She had chest pains, and it took quite a long time for the two of us to get the full story.

She ended up feeling fine, as we monitored her and gave her some oxygen. She just needed a little sit in the cool with some water - it was a very hot day. I ended up taking all three of them to the Arabic pavillion on a golf cart, so they could have a look around before they went home. They were all super friendly, and enjoyed the attention. We even had our photos taken with them, lots of fun. They were very impressed with our treatment of them, and with Edmonton in general.

But the point of this was to outline how hard it was to get history and symptoms from someone who doesn't speak your own language. I would ask the translator whilst looking at the patient, and watch as she responded, trying to get an idea of her level of discomfort based on her body language. It was quite the challenge, especially when there is a heart problem and you are trying to determine the severity of it.

It also highlights the two very different areas for us: alert people versus unconcious people. With people who can respond, you can try to find out some information, but it is often misleading, or they focus on the 'wrong' thing. With unconcious people, you treat what you find, which can often be simpler, but also way more scary and complicated.

Happy Ending

Last night I was at the Three Days Grace concert. First up were Idle Sons, then Mobile, followed by Theory of a Deadman. I was stage left with two other first aiders, watching the mosh pit curl back on itself and disgorge tiny wee crowd surfers like chunks of vomit (or "protein spills" as vomit is refered to on radio channels, heh).

We had a few things to deal with - bloody noses, crushed people, hurt feet. Most people got up and walked away. Like many of the mosh pits I've been to, bloody noses and black eyes are badges of honour. A few people who got a little bit squished came and sat on our stair chair for a bit. One or two had a little "protein spill" and felt better. A normal mosh pit. Suspected spinal injuries on one, but she was fine and soon disappeared into the crowd.

Later on, Three Days Grace were playing. A young lass was pulled from the front of the mosh pit by a security guard. I saw that she was in obvious distress, so I went over to help the security guard escort her over. She had trouble breathing, and I got her into the chair and tried to find out what was wrong. The concert noise, and her gasps, made it hard to work out what was happening.

Eventually, using my notepad, I was able to find out that she had been waiting six years to meet her favourite band, and had her autographed CD snatched from her hands whilst in the crowd. She was inconsolable, crying and wailing. I tried to get her to calm down, and I was seriously considering strapping her to the chair and transporting her to the first aid room to get her away from the noise and onto some oxygen.

A guy behind the side stage area tapped me on the shoulder and asked me which band. I asked her by way of notepad, and he saw her write "Idle Sons". He told me to hang on a minute. I crouched down and reassured her some more, trying to get her to slow her breathing rate. After a short while, the guy returned and we had a little shouted conversation. He had arranged for the band to meet with her - I thought he might do something like this. He asked if she was okay to walk, and I told him I'd take her until she was steady on her feet.

I knelt before her and told her that we were going for a walk. I held her hand and lead her behind the stage and over to where some of Idle Sons were waiting. She staggered, and then went from a hunched position to standing fully upright and saying "OH MY GOD!" really loudly. Seriously, it was better than giving her oxygen. She couldn't beleive it, and hugged two of the guys straight away. We walked under the seats to where their dressing rooms were, and the rest of the band were there. Members of the other bands were coming and going, and asked if this was the girl, and if she was okay now. She was delighted - looking from face to face, unable to believe her eyes.

I told 'em to take care of her, I told her to keep breathing, and I left them to it. They were just piling in the elevator to go up to their merchandising desk on the main floor.

I went back to our area and found the concert over. We waited until it all cleared, and then went back to the first aid room. A little later, when things were clear, I wandered over to the table where the bands were. I thanked Idle Sons for taking care of her, and learnt that a lot of people on the tour are called Sean. Heh.

Water Main

Yesterday afternoon there was a water main break on Jasper Avenue. This kind of thing happens when the temperature goes up and down like a yoyo. As a result of the pipe burst, an email went around to everyone in the building I work in which basically said "Don't pee!".

Everyone crossed their legs and carried on with their day.

A little while later another email arrived which basically said "OMG NO SPRINKLERS GET OUT NOW!". I can imagine the discussion downstairs:
Building Person 1: Better tell them not to pee, they can't flush
Building Person 2: Hmm that might get smelly after a while
BP1: True, maybe we should evacuate them before it gets too bad, hehehe
BP2: Hahaha, yes. Oh wait, what else uses water?
BP1: The sprinklers?
Both: ARGH! Get everyone out now before the insurance company gets us!

Of course, as we evacuated (so nice to be able to use the elevators rather than the stairs; no fire!) one wag was sure to mention how, if a fire did break out, we could probably put it out by peeing on it. A number of people with fixed grins enthusiastically agreed. It was a great relief to finally get home.

Home Town Mentioned

My hometown gets a mention on one of the blogs I read regularly, Diagnosis? N.F.I.

I also read Random Acts of Reality - that was the first UK medical blog I started reading. I'm also partial to Nee Naw, NHS Blog Doctor, and The Policeman's Blog.

The Littlest Mermaid

On Saturday I was at the Halloween-O-Rama, which is held in the Legislature Grounds. Two of us were providing first aid services for everyone there, and we wandered around inside the Interpretive Centre because the snows had come and it was cold outside. We had an ambulance parked outside, free hot chocolate, and lots to see.

Whilst we were wandering around, we saw a lovely girl of about 4, dressed as a mermaid and using a walker to help her get about. She was with her family, they were all having fun, and she was smiling as she moved along with them. Something about her really touched my heart as I watched her enjoy the event.

My partner turned to me and said that she was impressed by the little girl, and thought she was strong for using her walker so well, so young. I said that of course she needed a walker, because mermaids feet hurt when they walk on land.

It was at that point I had to move on and do something else, because some dust had got into my eyes or something.

Photos

I don't have a camera at the moment. I have a camera phone, which I use now and again. I publish pictures I take on my Moblog. I also have a Flickr account. There aren't many pictures there, though.

I used to take loads of pictures. Then something happened. I stopped. I think it is related to various things that happened fairly recently in my life. I stopped caring. I stopped feeling. Nowadays, I don't take many pictures. I never really take pictures of me. I don't like the way I look on camera, or sound when recorded. I think this is true of most people, though.


There was a creepy-good movie a while ago. It was called One Hour Photo. There were a number of interesting quotes in it.

"And if these pictures have anything important to say to future generations, it's this: I was here. I existed. I was young, I was happy, and someone cared enough about me in this world to take my picture."

It's the last bit that resonantes most deeply. It was pointed out to me one time by someone that not taking pictures of them meant I didn't care about them. Looking back, I think that my subconcious had finally acknowledged the fact that they never really cared about me as deeply as I did about them, and my subconcious just gave up. Plus, the statement was made during a very traumatic time. So I don't know - I'm still thinking about this.


"Nobody takes a picture of something they want to forget. "

This is thought provoking too. Within the framework of 'family pictures', it's true - just happy memories. But we record moments as they happen, especially these days with the proliferation of digital media. We take pictures of anything and everything. There are still moments in time that we want to freeze forever though.

Questions

One time I was at a 'meet the author' session arranged by Greenwoods, the book shop, to see Terry Pratchett. He opened the floor for questions and I managed to ask him one:

"Do you find that any of your characters take on a life of their own, and become more than what you had planned for them?"

He thought that was a really good question. Just wanted to share that with you.